


The Mountain's Gaze

by inheritanceofgeek



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Addiction, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Eloping, F/M, Fígrid February, Gold Sick Fíli, Gold Sickness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-20
Updated: 2016-02-20
Packaged: 2018-05-20 20:02:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6022930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inheritanceofgeek/pseuds/inheritanceofgeek
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gold Sickness is rife in the blood of Durin, so Fíli feels it only right to abdicate and flee from its gaze. He is honoured when the love of his life agrees to come with him. </p><p>A year later, they try to return to visit Sigrid's family, however Fíli discovers that the mountain's gaze still has a hold of him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Mountain's Gaze

**Author's Note:**

> From the Fígrid Febraury Prompt: Gold Sickness/Addiction
> 
> I've no had a chance to check my Khuzdul spelling to please forgive me if it's wrong <3

Fíli's eyes remained resolute upon the mountain. It was his. His by birthright! The pretender to the crown had stolen it all from him. His hands turned into white knuckled fists on the reigns of his horse. A horse. What kind of insult was this? He was a King! The true heir of Durin! He deserved to ride in on a Ram decorated in armour of mithril, not some meagre Rohanion Pony.   
  
He could do it as well. He was still a warrior, his hands had not forgotten what it was like to hold steel. He could charge in there and slice the head off of their "king" and then they would have no choice but to give the gold to him.   
  
A voice floated across to him as if on the wind. A distant melody, beautiful and calming. "Ghivashelê?"   
  
Slice it off and hold it by it's stupid hair and... and no that was... that was his brother. His baby brother he... No. No how could be even think of doing that? The gold though... If he just   
  
"Ghivashelê come back to me, please."   
  
That voice again. Pulling him back into reality. His Kamazûnsch. His Marlûno. The real treasure of all treasures in all the lands.   
  
"Fíli. Please." And he felt the touch of her hand upon his. Instantly everything drained away from him and he was in the here and now once more. Sigrid's face was full of concern and there was deep sorrow in her eyes. She looked like she'd dismounted her own horse in a hurry, not even bothering to set the reigns straight. His heart broke at what he'd put her through. The pain and misery he caused her every day.   
  
"Cariad, I'm so sorry." He took her hand in both if his, hissing her knuckles "I'm so sorry I didn't mean it I..."   
  
"I know. It was the thoughts about Kíli again, wasn't it?"   
  
He nodded, a lump coming to his throat. How could he think those things... Kíli hadn't even wanted to be king, he'd only taken the role on after Fíli had abdicated. After he'd  _ chosen _ to abdicate by his own regard. Kíli had never shown even a hint of suffering from the Gold Sickness, but Fíli had felt it in every fibre of his being. As soon as that crown was placed upon his head, he felt his thoughts begin to darken and draw him towards the dragon's hoard.   
  
The only person to pull him out of it was Sigrid. She challenged him in council meetings where nobody else was brave enough. Kept her cool whenever a shouting match arose between the three kings and cut them down with her quick wit. She listened to him when he spoke of all his woes and didn't try to fix things. She just held him close and let him cry.   
  
How she could love a monster such as himself he would never know, but he tried his hardest everyday to be worthy of her. When they'd eloped she'd given up everything. Her family, her new home, her people. All for him. How could he ever do that justice? He felt tears begin to prick at the corner of his eyes.   
  
"We can try again next year. We'll send a messenger with our regards and wishes. They'll understand. It's only an anniversary. There'll be others."   
  
"I'm so sorry." He gulped, "I've done all this to you, you should go. I'll turn around and go home. You've come too far now to turn back. You're still their princess." A smile quirked across his lips "They'll want to see your beautiful face again, and it'll be better to tell them the good news in person rather than in a letter." He reached out to gently rub at her rounded stomach.   
  
That was another thing that ate at him. Could he really be a good father if he had these thoughts about his own brother? Who he'd as good as raised. He shook his head and tried to get rid of his doubts. He wasn't like this back in Rohan. Not at all. He could handle coins and earn a good living as a blacksmith. He could be surrounded by gold leaf and diamonds from Dwarven mines and be, if not completely at ease, then capable of keeping the sickness well at bay.   
  
Sigrid saw that in him. Saw the dwarf who'd stayed by his brother's side, who'd run head first into an Orc in order to save her and protect her family. Whose first act as king was to pay her people back what they'd been owed and then some. Even though he'd told her afterwards he'd secretly desired to keep it all to himself. He had still done the right thing in the end, had not let the sickness take complete control and she knew, even if he didn't, that he would never allow it to.   
  
"Fíli, I don't mind if we can’t go, honestly."   
  
"Well I do." He said, almost pleading with her "Go and celebrate the rebuilding of Dale. Enjoy every second so as you can tell me all about it when you get back."   
  
"If you're sure..." She hesitated "You'll be alright without me?"   
  
Fíli chuckled softly "This isn't the first time we've been separated. You've been away from home before."   
  
"Yes, but not like this..." She tailed off, glancing back up at the mountain Fíli was doing his best to ignore.   
  
"Maybe next year." He stroked a hand through her hair "Next year. I'll do better next time."   
  
"Of course you will you silly dwarf. You can do anything you put your heart to." She kissed him sweetly before going back and mounting her horse in an ease only those of the Mark seemed to have developed. "I'll see you in a week. Just a week and I'll be home to tell you all about it."   
  
"Promise?"   
  
"Promise."   
  
"I love you." He smiled as he waved her off   
  
"Asti-zu" she called back, kicking her horse into a gallop now that she could see Dale once more. Fíli watched as the golden shimmer of her hair disappeared into the horizon.   
  
He felt the judgemental stare of the mountain and turned his back to it. As he rode away towards the home they'd made for themselves in the Mark, he wondered, not for the first time, if he'd ever see her again. If she would choose to return to her life as the wife of a blacksmith. To a husband who couldn't even look at a pile of old rocks without suffering a relapse. He really would not blame her.   
  
To love an addict was not an easy thing to do, but then Sigrid had never been one to follow the easy route where her heart was concerned.


End file.
